Insomnia

[naomikritzer]

I had chronic insomnia as a kid. Then at some point during or after college, it went away. I'd go to bed and fall asleep within about ten minutes.

In the last year, the insomnia came back. Not every night, but still. Last night was really bad. I went to bed at 1 a.m. At 2 a.m., Kiera woke up. I was still wide awake, and having her in bed with me makes it harder for me to get to sleep, so rather than bringing her in with me, I got up and nursed her back to sleep. She went back down at 2:45 a.m. I went back to bed. She got up again shortly after 3 a.m. This time I just brought her into bed. Oddly, she didn't ask to nurse, so I just laid her down next to me and tried again to get to sleep, but every time she'd poke me or kick me it would wake me right back up. At around 4 a.m. I pushed her over more towards Ed's side of the bed. Shortly after that it became clear that she was also wide awake: she sat up and just kind of hung out, sitting up, in bed. At 4:15 a.m, Ed got up with her and took her somewhere else.

At some point after that, I fell asleep. Ed brought Kiera back in at 5 a.m. -- or she came in and threw a fit when he tried to take her out again, I don't really remember. I nursed her at that point, and Ed came back to bed, too, though I'm not actually sure whether he was able to get any more sleep. Once I've fallen asleep I can usually go back to sleep, no problem, so I went right back to sleep until 8:30 a.m. when my alarm went off.

Insomnia sucks. Most nights that I have it, I wake up feeling okay despite the shortened night's sleep, but mostly I get to sleep well before 4 :30 a.m. I know that some of the things I do are making it worse, but in each case I don't have much choice.

* I don't go to bed at the same time each night. However, I can't go to bed until Keira goes to bed, and she is unpredictable in the hours she keeps.

* I use the computer before bedtime. Late at night is currently the only time I have to write.

* Even after realizing that I'm not going to be able to fall asleep, I usually stay in bed. If Kiera is in bed with me, I have to, or she'll wake up.

* I think my habit of eating a bedtime snack may be exacerbating the problem, but I usually get hungry around then, and if I don't eat, the hunger keeps me awake. I'm sure it's not good that I eat chocolate late at night, but dammit, I want to be able to sit down and enjoy a leisurely treat every now and then without my kids trying to steal it from me, and I can only do that after they are in bed and Kiera doesn't go to bed until eleven most of the time.

* I can't take sleeping pills, because it's dangerous to share a bed with a small child if you're medicated. Also, I have not had good luck with sleeping pills: Ambien made me hallucinate when I took it while in labor, and even if it hadn't, it made me so nonfunctional that in a fire or other emergency I would be helpless and unable to get myself out of the house, let alone my kids. I want to be able to get to sleep, but I also NEED to be able to wake up.

I apologize if this is incoherent. I feel lousy today.

Comments

[silkblade.livejournal.com]

My nutritionist recommended having a carb and/or turkey based snack an hour or two before bed to help me sleep. It seemed to work a little bit.

[magentamn.livejournal.com]

Have you tried warm milk? Seriously, I realized that drinking steamers at coffee shops was making me sleepy. I don't like the taste of warm milk, but there are plenty of things to flavor it with - cinnamon &/or nutmeg come to mind. (If it works, you can buy those bottles of syrup they used for steamers.)

I have to be cautious about chocolate at bedtimes these days myself.

suggestions

[(Anonymous)]

You might try valerian (capsules from a reputable herbal supplement company). Search for on it on Sybermoms, I sent a bunch of links there on an insomnia thread a while back. It smells AWFUL, but works for my occasional insomnia, and is thought to be ok for nursing. Sandy (Zea from SM)

[pants-of-doom.livejournal.com]

Have you tried melatonin?

[tanaise.livejournal.com]

When I was younger, I had to commute every day between my parents houses--wake up at one, fall asleep at the other. And I'd already been rather prone to lying awake worrying about things. So one thing I did was train myself so that if there was one constant, I could fall asleep. I'd play the radio (or at least music of some sort), and fall asleep in minutes. On good nights i'll think, 'Oh, that's a good song, but I like the next one better," and be asleep before the first song is over. And on bad nights, at least I've got music to listen to. If your sleeping partner(s) are the type to get bothered by noise at night, you can try headphones, and if you're lucky enough to have an Ipod or some such, you can use the awake and trapped in bed time to listen to audiobooks or something similar that you never have time to do otherwise.

i'd almost suggest that you get yourself checked for an anxiety problem, as my brother was apparently having a horrible time sleeping last summer which turned out could be easily handled, but since you're nursing, that's probably not an option for you. It might still make it easier to deal with--I find that often if i realize why I'm doing something, it makes it go away, or I pay less attention to it. (I got panic attacks, realized it was something I'd trained my body to do as a response to my asthma acting up, and can now sometimes calm myself down from a panic attack by checking to see if I'm just having trouble breathing--as soon I realise that yes, it's hard to breathe, the panic starts to leak away.)

And my mother swears by having a bedtime ritual. When we were little she was very big on the rituals, as they conditioned us into sleeping better, i think. If you have a bath and then a book and then bed, every night, you start expecting bed as soon as the bath is being run. (But that may have been part of her animal behavior/psychology masters degree, come to think of it. Classical conditioning for Children.) But how it applies on a grownup level is, it doesn't matter what time you're finally preparing for bed is, you always do the same things in the same order before bed--brush your teeth, wash your face, check on the kids, kiss the hubby, etc. Nothing's fool proof, but at least this way you've got to fight conditioning if you want to lie awake and stare at the ceiling....

[allochthon.livejournal.com]

Much sympathy.

I do occasionally take sleeping pills, but I have to take them before I realize I'm going to have insomnia. Because once I take one, I'll sleep 8 hours. Even if I take the pill at 3am. Not good for a person who is supposed to be at work at 8.

And since they're addictive, I don't want to take them every night on the chance I'll have insomnia.

Still working through this one.

Much sympathy.

[naomikritzer]

I did try melatonin; it doesn't appear to do jack squat for my insomnia, unfortunately.